It take work to blend two families. Internal spiritual work.
When I married Nicole I didn’t understand the full significance of blending two families.
Family is God’s plan and if he’s not the key ingredient of them they’ll become unstable and fall apart.
The only hope for families today is commitment to change spiritually by letting God lead.
Be careful of what you pray for.
Before I married this time I prayed to God for a family that’s grounded in love because I knew God is love.
I study His word daily which develop into a strong trusting relationship.
I began to hear Him speak to me. One night while I was at work God told me to marry Nicole so I did.
After our honeymoon on the Virgin Island in St Tomas, we came home and I was still on that honeymoon high.
I couldn’t stop smiling.
I meditated on how beautiful Virgin Island was. I vision how clear the water was.
Me and wife could look down in the ocean and see fish and turtles swimming all around us two love birds.
I recall how they seem to have no problems. I believe that how our marriage would be.
Nicole had three children coming into our marriage and so did I.
It wasn’t two weeks after our honeymoon when Nicole asked me can DJ come stay with us because he’s having problems staying with his father in Muncie.
DJ is her oldest son who’s twenty-two years old. I immediately came down from my honeymoon high.
I went to God the one who told me to marry this woman and asked Him.. why?
I explain to Him how I still have sand in some of my clothes from the honeymoon. This is too soon God! I still have sand in my shoes!
God asked me why I think everything is about me.
He told me it was more about them than me and I should look forward to the challenge if I’m to grow spiritually.
All he wanted me to do was follow His lead and stay out His way.
I went back to wife confused and told her no DJ can’t stay with us now, but maybe later.
But I forgot Nicole have a relationship with God also and He told her to bring him.
God always have his way. A week later DJ was at our house.
DJ isn’t a bad kid I just wanted my house, okay my wife, to myself.
It’s one thing to read and understand God’s word it’s another to practice it.
God wanted me to practice what I knew and that was putting others before me.
But my flesh wanted what it wanted so it kept reminding me I have a grown man staying in my home.
The Devil knew I didn’t like that idea. The Devil is good at what he does.
Now operating out of the flesh, I started listening to the Devil more.
Satan knew I was the head of the house so he attack me hard.
One day DJ and I got into an argument that almost went to blows. He told me to step outside…and I did.
While I was out there waiting on DJ and full of anger, I turned around to see him coming but my wife lock me out the house.
Then I heard God’s quiet voice tell me this is your wife’s child you want to fight Vernon.
The one I gave you. I started to cry.
I asked God in desperation what He wanted me to do. He told me to love DJ, that’s all.
He said I was to busy listen to the Devil than listening to Him. He reminded me how I prayed to Him for a family built on love.
He said love in the home starts with me.I loved on DJ by getting out of God’s way.
Now he’s working, got his own car and about to get his own apartment. DJ no longer get in trouble.
Sometimes God put us into situations that we don’t understand but if we’re committed to letting Him work on us, he will make any blended family work.
God’s love never fail; we just need to get out His way.